I'm going to let you all in on a little secret. Lest you all think that words just fly beautifully across the screen when a blogger sits down to type: It doesn't actually work that way.
I mean, yeah, sometimes. Sometimes I have so much to say that I forget half of it while my brain is busy trying to find the right way to say it.
But the other sometimeses? Lots of white screen, people. And made-up words, like "sometimeses".
For example, today I've had lots of ideas rolling around in my head. Post-It notes have been jotted on, journals have been quickly grabbed for ideas to be written in. But now that it's quiet in my home for a solid hour (a threatened-with-thrown-out-Halloween-candy hour), I've got nothing.
Except that's not completely accurate. I still have those ideas simmering, Bible quotes to find, pictures to edit.
But there's also Facebook calling. And laundry beeping. And so many other things pulling for my attention that that skillfully written prose that was coming out is just flying away in the wind. (From the ceiling fan--which needs to be dusted--maybe I should go do that...)
See what I mean?
So, today, I'm giving you a how-to guide, just in case any of you out there need some excuses to procrastinate on anything you are trying to do. It's a holiday week--I KNOW there are some first-class putter-offers out there just waiting for this!
How To NOT Write a Blog Post:
1. Sit down to type and remember that probably you should check your email first, just in case the notification came that you won one of the fifty exciting giveaways that you entered. Once you see that it's not there, open the rest of your email anyway.
2. Please don't forget Facebook. Someone may have posted that exact item you have been searching for for Aunt Debbie's Christmas gift in the Swap group. It would be horrible if you missed it!
3. Speaking of Aunt Debbie, if that perfect gift isn't on Facebook right now, it's probably a Lightning Deal on Amazon. Go look. (And you can use my affiliate link if you want, *wink*).
4. Have you emailed Aunt Debbie to ask her where to find the perfect gift? Maybe you should do that--just real quick!
5. Don't forget to see what emails have come in while you were emailing Aunt Debbie. Don't want to miss that giveaway win, do you?
6. No giveaway notifications, but there is that ad from XYZ Curriculum Company. That's the one you've always meant to check out, remember? Well, you have just a teensy-tiny bit of time right now--want to hop on over there and take a quick look?
7. Drat. There's that laundry beep. May as well go ahead and fold the clean clothes so that you don't have to do them later, when it's dinner and bath and bedtime.
8. Oops! Speaking of dinner, didn't you forget to take the meat out / turn on the crock pot / buy the ONE ingredient you are missing? It'll just be a quick thing to go do. Really quick.
9. Or maybe it would be better just to Google "quick and simple dinner ideas with only three ingredients". Yeah, that would definitely be better!
10. Are you now wondering why your kiddos are coming out of Quiet Time already? Check that clock, sister! You've successfully procrastinated all of your time away! Time Suck Queen crown for you!
(Not that any of that ever has happened in this house! And let's just forget that the title of the post that maybe was supposed to be up here today was something completely different--and much more brilliant!)